18 December 2007

What the Hell is He Talking About???

Like any organization the USAF has a language of their own. I humbly offer some examples.

AIM:

Air-Intercept Missile

Bear:

The Electronic Warfare Officer (EWO), the GIB. Refers to pilot’s opinion that a trained bear can replace the GIB. Also a Tu-95 Russian Bomber.

The Blue Zoo:

The United States Air Force Academy at Colorado Springs, Colorado. Also known as “Colorado Kool-Aid U” and “The Colorado Home for Wayward Boys”

FUF:

Fucker Up Front. Pilot in two seat aircraft such as an F-4 Phantom.

GIB:

Guy in Back. Slang term for WSO, RIO, and B/N. The guy behind the FUF.

Going to Guns:

Switching to cannon. Assuming leadership. Taking control of any situation.

Hittles:

The opposite of Missiles. (See- Missiles)

Local talent:

Derogatory term used to desribe any female living near an Air Force Base who does nothing but have sex and use airmen for money. Said females have usually been married and divorced at least three times before they turn 25.

Missles:

Objects that fall off the rail and do whatever they want. The opposite of Hittles.

One in the Hangar:

Pregnant.


Rhino:

The F-4 Phantom II in all its Glory. An unattractive WAF.


The Sand Box:

Iraq.

SAM:
Surface-to-Air Missile.

Touch and Go's:

Repeatedly falling asleep in a meeting or a class while trying desperately to stay awake. After nodding off, the person's head will dip forward almost to his chest, whereupon he will snap back into a very brief state of semi-consciousness and repeat the process. Named after practice landings where the aircraft descends, briefly touches down while still rolling forward, and quickly becomes airborne again.

T-birds:

The Thunderbirds, the USAF Air Demonstration Team. Also known as the “T-Kids” and “Thunder Chickens”.

TDY:

Temporary Duty Assignment. A road trip to a far distant and usually fucked up dirty country.

WAF:

Women of the Air Force. A female. Term replaced by generic “Airman” because of the widespread use of “We All Fuck”.

Download the whole USAF Slang Dictionary here.



A Christmas Story

Putin continues to put Bears in the air. Harkening back to the good ol' days when we were armed to the teeth waiting for the U.S.S.R. to attack us. As the Christmas Season is upon us it reminds me of a TDY back in 1979.


I was stationed at George AFB and was crewing F-4C's. We were tasked to go to Duluth Minnesota and relieve the Guard so that they could spend the holidays with the kiddies.

As it happened we got a real world scramble and sent two Phantoms aloft. After an hour or so they came back and as I parked the jet I noticed an AIM-9 Sidewinder missing and alot of black soot on the empty rail.

The pilot came off the ladder. Turned and gave me a thumbs up and said:

"Smoked that fucker".

He and his GIB got immediately into a staff car and were never seen again.

Makes you want to say.

"Hmmm?"


11 December 2007

World's Smallest Runway

Seeing is believing!



Insane Landing - Click here for the most popular videos

10 December 2007

New Paint Scheme Debuts on F-16



The F-16's at Eielson AFB, Alaska will be sporting a new paint scheme. They have been chosen as the first aircraft to receive the Arctic Camouflage. Airmen of the 8th FW, Kunsan AB, South Korea got the chance to apply the new camouflage as part of the 8th transferring their assigned jets to Eielson. Work was started in November in preparation of the transfer.




USAF photos by TSgt. Quinton T. Burris


Kunsan will be getting the more advanced Block 40 F-16's from Eielson and Kunsan's Block 30's will be flying as Agressors during Eielson's Red Flag-Alaska excercises with the new paint job.

Great Bush Landing

This video has been around for a while but it's worth a second look. It makes you appreciate landing on nice long, straight runways.

Enjoy.

video

02 December 2007

Grounded Again- The F-15















Much like an Undefeated Heavyweight succumbing to age rather than losing in the ring. The F-15 will be defeated by Father Time rather than in battle.

After recovering from the 3 November crash and taking to the air, the F-15 Eagle finds itself grounded again. Excluding the F-15E model, the Air Force has grounded the four earlier models.

Computer simulations by its Boeing manufacturer have cause serious concerns for the structural integrity of its backbone. Specifically the longerons that run from aft of the canopy to the tail. In a 28 November press release, Air Force officials have been quoted as saying:

"Although the longeron area was covered in general by previous inspections as a result of the November 2 mishap, technical experts with the Warner Robins Air Logistics Center, assisting in the Accident Investigation Board, have recommended a specific inspection of the suspect area based on the recent findings. Manufacturer simulations have indicated a catastrophic failure could result in this particular area."

It's Groundhog Day for the F-15 fleet as it awaiting completion of the emergency inspections.